3 Ways I Changed After I Said YES to Me
written by stephanie bwabwa
There was a time when people were the rulers of my world.
I was not certain how to live, I dare say, how to be, without their effervescent approval of who I was and what I did. I was a maiden in distress, though this girl couldn’t be saved, at least not by others. I viewed things in my life through dark lenses, never stepping back to take a moment and wipe them off so I could see clearly, and perceive with newness.
You see, I always said yes to others, always failing to allot myself the same grace and privilege.
I didn’t find myself worthy of a “yes”, but rather, “hold on’s” and “not right nows” and “you’re not good enough yet’s”. Then something changed. A bulb came on, and I realized, no. I will no longer live in such a manner. Surely, a life filled with hope, promise and gifting is worth MUCH more than this.
And that’s when it happened. I looked at myself in the mirror one day, and said it. I said a whopping YES to me. And from hence friend, I have never been the same.
3 magical things happened when I became brave enough to choose myself:
I Believed In My Purpose
I stopped doubting myself. In all seriousness.
I reached a place where constantly putting myself down and underestimating my abilities and worth was no longer acceptable. Saying yes to myself allowed me the freedom to step back and believe, I in fact am capable and good.
Purpose returned to me in every facet. Waking up with purpose. Working on my business with purpose. Having conversation with purpose. Praying with purpose.
A shell that had been closed in my mind for so long burst open and released all it’s splendor. Life opened itself to me and reminded me through all of it’s small gestures, that I too, had the ability to partake in it’s glory just like every other being on this planet.
This was a concept unknown to me, until, I gave myself permission to taste of goodness, even if it meant some doors with others were closing. I knew that choosing myself would come at a cost, and this time, I was willing to pay it, if only to enjoy this vapor of life but for a beauteous moment.
I Began to Truly Serve Others Intentionally
Something changes in you when you serve others knowing you are capable of doing so with grace and excellence. You also begin to do so through care and extreme compassion. My perception of myself grew like a flower blooming in the tides of spring, and my ability to serve bloomed as well.
I saw people through the light most of them see me through and it was beautiful. I could really see their true need, step into their shoes and sympathize on a deeper level. The souls around me were being seen through new light and I charged myself to serve them and work with them with intentionality.
I Began to Value the Valuable In Life
Invariably, the main thing returned to being the main thing. Life, love, hope, faith and liberty. The temporal, trivial things of life no longer held so much weight. I reached a place of contentment. Of endearment.
I no longer needed, wanted, things. What I desired was something more intangible. Long conversations with loved ones. Talking to my mom and our small moments while I still have her.
Taking the time to notice the children around me as they grow. Breathing in fresh air and looking up at a sun who is more faithful than a lifelong partner, for it rises and sets the same, every single day without fail, even if it cannot be seen.
I began to turn back to the Lord and remember to plant my treasures in eternal affairs, souls, rather than temporal things, stuff. Life took on a new meaning and that’s when I knew I truly began to live.
And so friend, the same goes for you. There comes a point in your life when you realize, and hello, I do mean you realize, that all 7 plus billion of us on this earth, have ONE earthly life to live, and that includes you.
Eventually, you have to pull back and say, “Hey! I have chosen family, I have chosen best friends, and in some cases I’ve even chosen strangers. But this time, I choose me. I choose to say YES to me.”
Saying yes to yourself is self-approval.
It is a reflection of self-confidence and reassurance. It is knowing that you hold the keys to the doors in your life and have the power to walk through anyone, any time, you ever lovin’ choose.
It is the power to liberate yourself from what you believe is the perception of others. Saying yes to yourself is a catalyst that launches you further and higher than you could have ever dreamed.
You deserve to choose yourself. You deserve to dare, to dream, to change, to grow, to morph into who you are in every season, you are.
Don’t be afraid of cutting ties and closing doors. If it means at the end of the day you have chosen YOU, well friend, I dare say, every loosed balloon is another weightless reminder of your self-liberation.
Dare. Brave. Choose yourself. Say yes to YOU.
Stephanie BwaBwa is an author and the infopreneur behind The Storytelling Creative where she passionately teach about storytelling and online branding. If she's not writing, you’ll generally find her going on about monkeys or obsessing over anything related to Disney.